Wednesday, June 29, 2005

I am now a fan of Tom Cruise


Just don't expect me to go see that overblown drek he's been promoting incessantly lately with his wackiness. I have to hand it to Dreamworks, why spend millions promoting the film when you can have your star lose his mind on every talk show on the air and get thousands of hours of free publicity. Just don't expect me to plop down $9.50 to see an hour and a half of Dakota Fanning crapping her pants in terror followed by the inevitable Spielberg trademark "There, There. Don't be upset, Unka Stevie will make evwything alllll better" bullshit ending. I'd rather rent Close Encounters (or better yet, borrow 'The Day The Earth Stood Still') to get my fill of Alien hijinx this holiday weekend. My cohort Josh sums it up perfectly with his Scientology rule for Sci-Fi Films. Name ONE good Sci-Fi film starring a practicing scientologist. Besides, Steve will never surpass his masterpiece (and no, I'm not being sarcastic. I really mean it.)

Of course ya gotta love how the media is attacking him like a pack of starving wolves after handling him with kid gloves for so long. It's not like he's even saying anything that's horribly out of the mainstream:
"I think drugs are over prescribed by quack psychiatrists"
"I think there is probably life on other planets"
"I really want to bang Katie Holmes"
Hell, most of America agrees with at least one of those ideas... I guess ol' Tommy boy shoulda paid his publicist better. Oh well, that's show business. HOLLYWOOOOOOOOOD!

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